One of my favorite authors is going to be doing monologs on the opening night of the theater. It’s been in the works for a little while but it’s confirmed. I think if I get much more happy news, I might burst. I really like happy news, though, so I suppose I would welcome such bursting.

DSI’s 4th Annual 24-Hour Benefit Marathon of Improv Comedy

September 9th - 10th, 2005
begins at 10 PM, Friday September 9

DSI’s 24LIVE pushes performers to the limit in a marathon benefit of improv comedy presented in conjunction with The Artscenter and Transactors Improv to support the North Carolina Children’s Hospital. A small core cast from Dirty South Improv will draw support from Transactors Improv and other North Carolina comedy ensembles, professional improv comedians from Chicago and New York, and local celebrities from all Arts disciplines as they press on thru 24 straight hours of comedy improvisation.

Location: 300-G East Main Street, 27510
Box Office: 919-929-2787
24hr Pass: $14, $12 Students & AC friends

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CALLING MARATHON AUDIENCE MEMBERS

Do you have what it takes to stay awake?

DSI has decided to have audience members sponsored as a way to increase awareness about the event, spreading the word while describing the benefit to possible “sponsors” as a way to invite them out and let them know what we’re doing, and to help raise additional money for the benefit. The sponsored audience would be 24LIVE’s “Marathon Audience” audience members, complete with marathon numbers, etc.

Download Marathon Audience PDF file from http://dirtysouthimprov.com/24live/.

Dave Siegel and Chris Conklin perform for Freshman Camp, and are awesome. They pwned.

One thing I’m tired of is seeing comedy troupes, anyone, anywhere, whose names carry stupid connotations. I mean, literally, stupid. Why are you using the word “Idiot” in your name? (”Idiot Box” gets half a pass, since it started as TV-themed improv, but the other half doesn’t get the pass. All “Village Idiots” do not get the pass. “The Idiot Kings” is a great Soul Coughing song, but a sucky name for a troupe.)

Revel in the fact that comedy isn’t for idiots and isn’t done by idiots. Irony is done by idiots. Let your choice of a name be something that represents your awesomeness. The following words should be banned from the comedy troupe/team name list:

• stupid
• idiot
• fools
• ninnies
• morons
• simpletons

I reserve the right to add more at any time.

Add this rule to the lifetime ban on pictures of the team/troupe with their heads in a circle, my treatise against team/troupe names that desperately try to convince you that they’re going to be funny, and my complete distaste for wacky headshots.

Thank God I know everything.

The DSI buildout continues. It’s amazing how much has been done in exactly one week… the counter is almost complete, the tech booth has a wall and a door to the storage underneath, the walls have been built for the bathrooms and office, and there are some new pipes in there for the bathrooms. Some of the lighting fixtures are in now, too.

It’s awesome.

More pictures are up to help you see what’s happening: check http://www.flickr.com/photos/rosswhite/

The buildout has begun.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/rosswhite/search/tags:theater/

I know many of the readers of the blog have heard from one place or another what’s going on with the DSI Theater, but I’m now in that funny grey area where some people know what’s happening and others don’t and I might as well just get the word out so everyone knows. Phew. I’m glad I said that.

The lease is signed. We’ll be on the back side of Carr Mill Mall, between Fleet Feet and Elmo’s, accessible not through the mall but through the glass double doors at the top of the loading dock. Because we won’t have mall access, we won’t have to worry about observing the mall’s opening and closing times.

The space is about 1,400 square feet, and we are looking to seat 96 people in the theater. We’ll have an elevated tech booth, a stage raised two feet off the ground, and an entry/concessions counter when you walk in. In the back, we’ll have an office space that may double as a green room, and the mall is putting in bathrooms for us (and they have also added in a second exit in case of emergencies).

We plan to open October 7, but if we can finish the upfit before that point, we’ll do some neat things leading up to the grand opening. Shows will run Friday, Satuday, and Sunday nights. Look for us to start with seven shows a week– that may sound like a lot now, but we’ll be offering dramatically different shows in almost every slot.

The theater will be comedy. Only comedy. Nothing else. Comedy. Improv, sketch, standup, film, one-man shows, comedic plays, whatever’s funny. Comedy. Only comedy. (Note: Karaoke counts as comedy.)

We’ll not only continue to showcase teams that developed around the DSI community and in our classes, but we will become a hub for comedy from all sources and all roots in the Triangle. But know that if it hits the DSI stage, it has the DSI stamp of approval– we won’t be whoring our theater out to someone whose artistic merit doesn’t pass muster. We’ll be producing every show. (Note: Rich people, my artistic scruples can be bought.)

We’re going to create a family-friendly theater that doesn’t discourage innovation; by scheduling shows in prime time and a little later, we’ll be able to present a full roster of shows for all ages. (Note: If you like poop jokes, and only poop jokes, you will have to come see my one-man show, “Straight From the Fart,” presented at 1:00 AM.) You’re going to be able to bring the family out, you’re going to be able to bring the frat brothers out, you’re going to be able to bring the wife, and you’re going to be able to bring the kinky mistress.

Our classes are going to run out of this space, and we’re going to teach Chapel Hill, Carrboro, Durham, Raleigh, Pittsboro, and Graham the art of being freaking hilarious. You can take that promise to the bank. In fact, I’m willing to bet my facial structure on it.

In short, we are going to put comedy in your face. You may thank us later.

OK, so you have been reading this blog for a good long while, and you see all of this news about the new Carrboro-based comedy theater, and you think to yourself, “Wow, even though those DSI cats have been doing some stuff for a couple of years, getting into improv now that they are going to open a theater in October would put me on the ground floor of a really remarkable project.” And you’re right!

I’ll be teaching a Level 1 improv comedy class beginning in early August. And if you take that class, enjoy it, and continue on, you’d be looking at a Level 2 performance right around the time the theater opens. How cool would that be?

So, come take a class from me. I’m a remarkably affable fellow who makes himself very available to his students. I will turn you from a stage novice or stage newcomer into a comedy machine. That’s right– no comedy or theater experience is necessary. Just the willingness to come out and have fun each week.

Click here to register: http://dirtysouthimprov.com/classes/classdetails.php?ClassID=14

If you enroll in this class and you do not have a great experience, you may punch me in the face.*

*Please do not punch too hard. I am very fragile.

“The adhesive force is is your way of writing, not sensible connection.”

“Guessing leaves you more options.”

–Richard Hugo, The Triggering Town

Or, restated for the improviser, the adhesive force if your character, persona, or true heart. Sensible connections aren’t always important, and leave them to your teammates if you need to.