Man, this is how f–ed up the world is right now:

We put all kinds of dollars into nanotechnology so researchers at Cal Tech can make the world’s smallest g.d. smiley. We can’t cure AIDS or cancer.

Our news outlets consider it news that we think the news sucks. Meanwhile, the news continues to suck.

Who the hell is in space to see Apple’s iPod ad? If you’re a damn astronaut, you should already have an iPod, because you have to be playing Steppenwolf’s “Magic Carpet Ride” on repeat.

I don’t give a damn that Randy Quaid was screwed by the producers of Brokeback Mountain. How the fuck does he command a seven-figure salary in the first place?

Oh, and our President still thinks he’s the fist of God. Newsflash: God wouldn’t pick a former cokehead for her fist! She’d pick someone cool and ironic, probably one of those dandies from Belle & Sebastian. I vote for the one with the ears.