Anyone else hoping that the pressure-cooker of NYC fame will cause Randy Johnson to explode now that he’s a Yankee? He’s already simmering, it looks like.

So lemme get this straight. If I were anyman with a gun, and I were fragging goblins and ghoulies to my hearts’ content, I’d be all right. But if I’m role-playing as a hero combatting evil, I’m more likely to become belligerent?

(I know the study refers to behaviors in children, but I am nothing if not a big child. Thanks to Teachers’ Lounge for the link.)

Further proof that AIDS was caused by the unholy union of man and monkey: rhesus monkeys have genes that inhibit them from becoming infected, while people do not.

So, while we claim we’re sooooo evolved, it turns out that soon we’ll all be shooting up monkey DNA, just so we can do the humpity-hump with whomever we like. I will almost certainly use this as the excuse I have been waiting for: there’s a bunch of people at whom I’d like to throw some poo!

Update! It’s a monkey-lovin’ day! Now we have monkey robots!

It looks as though the RIAA has got some of its coverts working in museums now; a second-grader from Durham was told this weekend that she was not allowed to sketch paintings at the North Carolina Museum of Art because it violated copyright. (The guard was in error; according to museum policy, there is no copyright issue, and telling a second-grader she can’t sketch is an asshole thing to do.)

It’s not really the poor guard’s fault– if you see enough of the MPAA’s “Piracy is Killing My Family” spots that have been showing before every movie on the big screen, I’m sure you’d also be concerned about the intellectual property rights of a dead painter whose most influential works were completed before 1921 being poached by an eight-year-old.

But I thought it might be worth noting that just about anything else you might want to do for fun is a violation of copyright, including but not limited to:

• using a digital picture of Julia Roberts you got off Yahoo!, cutting out the head, and pasting it on a nudie pic you got from downloadtitties.com
• making one of those photo collages
• copying high school Spanish textbooks, by hand, while sitting in a monastery cell, then selling the copies on the streets of Manhattan for pennies on the dollar
• eating 12-15 Stephen King books then shitting out a new Stephen King novel